my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
