At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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