She is in my trunk
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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