TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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