he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
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