At least make sure they are 18
Why
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
