I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
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