you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
