Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Randomize
