Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Randomize
