Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
