2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
