I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
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