if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
