He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Blow job season was short but glorious.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
