I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
