i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
I need moral support for this bender
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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