He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
