i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
