I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Randomize
