quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
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