People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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