She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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