sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Randomize
