He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
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