Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
