they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
No more Irish car bombs ever.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Randomize
