We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Did I show you my penis last night?
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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