OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Randomize
