butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Randomize
