May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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