So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Randomize
