But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
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