OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
