What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
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