I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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