Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
