i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Randomize
