Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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