margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize