Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
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