Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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