I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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