what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I'm getting married
To pizza
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
