That's intense
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Randomize
