my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
