I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
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