I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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