The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Randomize