did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize